Tuesday, September 8, 2009

A Broken Dream

Have you ever planned of something important to do and yet end up with failure? I bet you do. The worst thing so far happened to me and currently I would say I am suffering inside. I've been planning this for almost a year and as the day gets closer the excitement built up. It's already less than two months away and when I'm about to do the final preparations, here comes the most dreadful news that basically affected and ruined everything.

The plan was for me to go for a trip to the Philippines, my home country. I purposely planned on this since there are some people that I have to visit, people that I loved so much. I missed them since my last trip back home last year. Final plans and itineraries were almost done. The problem that came up was the medical condition of my mom. She has been complaining about the pain on her right knee since last year and this time around it's getting worse. She already reduced her working days from fulltime 5 days to 3 days a week only. Even with extra days for her to rest, she still have difficulty walking and most of the time the pain becomes unbearable for her when it involves long standing and walking in her job. Consulting her doctors, she was advised to have a knee replacement surgery as soon as possible if she wanted back her lifestyle. The surgery itself would take about 5 hours and the physical rehabilitation would take about 6 months on the average. The decision was made to have the surgery not later than October because considering the length of time for the rehabilitation; we can still go home to the Philippines by July of next year for their 50th wedding anniversary. I strongly felt that I need to be with them all throughout the process throughout the duration of the rehabilitation. My mom won't be able to walk normally by then and my dad is still working full time so they actually need an extra hand. The surgery would occur before my scheduled trip which will be on the last week of October so I decided, hurtful it maybe, to cancel my trip to the Philippines.

Right now, I'm in a huge dilemma how to tell the sad news to the people who are already expecting me. They also made their own plans to fit with my itinerary and with so much excitement, this sudden blow of sad news would definitely crush them. I felt guilty because I will cause sadness with the decision that I have to make. The only consolation that I could have is the understanding of these people. I love them so much and deciding to cancel the trip and ruin everything is equally painful for me. I just hope that they can forgive me and understand me. Priorities and decisions have to be made no matter how painful it is.

4 comments:

veracris said...

Hi, the choice you've made is not really breaking your dreams at all. That dream will still be fulfilled only at a later date. It is only a question of priority at this point, you made your choice and it's the right one. Your friends dear to you will surely understand your choice. So, keep that dream alive and be cool.

Chronicler said...

@veracris - thanks for the kind words. I know I have made the right decision.

Kablogie said...

Bro, many times na nangyari sa akin yan..ka-badtrip lang talaga eh. Minsan pag meron akong gustong mangyari di ko pinagsasabi sa iba. kunbaga sikreto lang na wlang linaw na hanggang sa dumating na yun takdang araw. O di ba? walang masyadong umasa pero nangyari!

Chronicler said...

@Kablogie - thanks for visiting and the comments, man. Nakausap ko na ang mga taong nagaabang sa paguwi ko and they understand.